When do we start living life?

I recently was talking to my cousin Tim and the subject of life came up as it so often does. It somehow came up that there isn’t a point at which we start living life. We’re not going to suddenly wake up one day and be more fully engaged with what we’re doing, happy with all aspects of life, and be on the dream track forward. If we live with the thinking that we’ll cross a threshold into happiness at some point, we’re mistaken. We’ve been living life since we were born, and if we’re not content with what’s going on, we have to identify the controllable elements and manage those appropriately to move us in the right direction according to our value system.

For much of my time growing up, I believed at some point something would click or change and I would become an adult with a family in a house and possess all the wisdom and experience that all adults have who have everything figured out. Well, the years have continued to roll by and that light switch moment has yet to happen - and it won’t. How, then, do we continue moving ourselves in the right direction and get the most out of the life we are already living?

At the bottom or root of all of these big questions is the “why” or the personal mission statement. I first read about this idea in “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People” last spring when I was home with my injured knee. Once written, this relatively simple statement becomes our foundational “why” for every single decision we make in life. Most every organization or company has a mission statement to guide their progress, why shouldn’t we have one for ourselves? With our value system put into words in a few sentences, the bigger, often intimidating, questions become simple and much easier (not necessarily easy) to answer.

When we ask ourselves “when will I start living life?” we are likely not fully content with our situation, which means we’d benefit from revisiting our values and what’s important to us and see if we are aligned in that moment.

When we ask ourselves “when will I start living life?” we are likely not fully content with our situation, which means we’d benefit from revisiting our values and what’s important to us and see if we are aligned in that moment. Throughout the past two years, I have gone through periods of time where I felt so in tune with what I was doing and so content with my life at that moment. There have been other, more challenging periods where I have felt the complete opposite and found I was asking myself things like “what am I doing?” “is it really worth all this time, money, and effort doing PT to get back on the bike?” “for what?” - and at times I haven’t been able to answer these questions.

Creating a personal mission statement is something that’s been on my to-do list since I read it and I haven’t made time to sit down and actually do it. So, what’s the hold up?? I think part of me is afraid to seriously ask myself those big questions because it might mean changing my thinking or approach to various parts of life and my relationships. I leave home at the end of this week for an undetermined amount of time as I move into the next phase and this is the week I will sit down and put the words that have been swirling around my head for so long into writing. I started the process yesterday by beginning to write down some of the roles I play in life and what my “centers” are - this won’t happen overnight.

Asking the question “when do we start living life?” is almost nonsensical. We’re in it now! It’s up to us to do what is aligned with our values, our core, and to make sure we are nourishing the relationships and experiences that serve us and letting go of those that do not serve us.

I have spent a decent portion of the time when I’ve been off the bike in the past two years living in my childhood home. I am so grateful not only for the time spent with my parents but also for what questions this time has forced in front of me and the clarity being in this space affords. In certain moments, it feels like I might be throwing my time out the window because I am not out there “living my life” when in fact I am gaining more clarity than I could have ever imagined on what’s true to me and what my “why” is - and, yes, I am actually living my life despite the circumstances and physical location. Sometimes it takes some space or time to realize the value one experience, relationship, or twist in the road brings to one’s life. It might even take some outside the box thinking to see the benefits and it’s worth exploring the different perspectives on the many situations we encounter.

We are all, as a society, often thrown distractions that cloud our ability to see our “why” as we grapple with the infinite windows into the lives of others on social media and the skewed reward systems built into these platforms for the sole purpose of profit. That’s why things like being outside, Intermittent Phone Fasting, and taking the time to ask ourselves what our “why” is can help us keep on the right track and truly live life.

So, this week, I will at least begin to put my personal mission statement on paper, where it will serve me as a foundation for future decisions and exist as an ever-developing reminder of what is true to me so I can continue on the best path forward for me. Hope you got something out of this! Until next time - stay safe and thank you for reading.

-Ben Grannis
#EyesUp